rockin' my world.

Another chapter ends .. will another open ? ~ What u have said .. really sort of touched me .. cause u never once said something like this b4 .. ~ Vows we have made .. sorry .. but i'm gonna break it first .. i need a break . I want to leave . But do not fear that i won't come back .. the little boy just wanna go away for some time ... he wants to be alone .. ~ You have to hold on to that hope that i will come back .. and u have to get me back if u don't wanna lose me .. it's your spirit that u are gonna count on now . ~ it may gonna take a year .. 2 years .. it could be 5 years ... it could be never . ~ So now .. i'm left with my gang .. my band of brothers .. my family and me . i no longer have a pillar to rely on now .. i must stand alone now . ~ i really felt like crying just now .. i think back .. how our story started ... how we laughed together .. the times we have cried .. the times we really wish to hug each other and that we didn't in the end ... The way u would smile to me .. the way Sparky would moan in sadness if u didn't open the door ... ~ Sorry .. that i have to leave ... i have to be the one . ~ If we can be together once again .. God will open another path for me to take no matter what . In the last min .. miracles do happen ... ~ you won't see me for a long long time ... don't be be surprised or disappointed of who i've become . i may find a girl i really love .. i may become a rough and ruggard man .... i may die in an accident of speeding . ~ you seem so far when i try to catch up with u .. i kept running .. i tried my best .. but i grown tired .. i couldn't run anymore . ben fell ... and never got up again . ~ no .. no i won't , i won't look back , i won't think bout the past .. cause i know .. i will feel hurt .. i will feel sad .. the story of us ends here . i'm sorry . Whether a new chapter begins , depends on me and u . ~ i just hope .. he loves you more than i do . So u may become a happier person ... then i shall take my leave . My job ends here . ~ i don't know .. i always thought that my feelings for u died .. completely . but now i'm not that sure .. but i think i have blasted all of them dead ... so the qn is ... will another girl come by and save the drowning man ? ~ will i go after a girl now .. or will i be too hurt to be able to love again .. i don't dare . i'm afraid ... just like a child that has lost his way .. ~~ Gentlemen , victory is yours . The day all of you awaited has come . it's now left with me .. how am i gonna handle it . will i ever be the same again ? will the little child in me be revived again ... never thought of my feelings right guys ? please .. spare a thought for me .. it's not easy .. to let go and break a bone of you . ~~ i'm no superman .. and it's not easy to be me . i won't be so great to forgive u .. time and again . i have to fight with myself ... the mind is giving but the heart stays . ~ i think my bro .. has lost his best friend too ... he's very lonely now .. and i don't know what to do ... i'm so sorry ...for not getting u a present ... forgive me . ~~ everytime i sit down in my room .. i look up . I see that big ff8 poster .. and it just reminds me of you .. ~ Squall .. gave up on rinoa when rinoa was brought away for execution .. Squall said .. " i should let her go .. if she wants to go .. i should respect her decision .. " His friends ... scolded him . " what the hell are u doing ? u are gonna lose rinoa forever !! Go get her back !! GO !! " ~ everywhere i go .. the song An jing follows me .. it plays in my heart .. i just wanna stand there . and hope that u come .... ~ everything that i have told you .. taught you .. please remember and cherish all those words ... whatever i have said .. forget or remember them is your choice .. if u wanna make yourself forget me .. then forget .. but if u wanna bring them as memories , remember . ~ so .. this chapter .. just adds on to my pile of fragments of memories ... ~ My heart .. may die . i may not accept the fact that i have to leave u . i may fall . the truth is too hurting ... ~ Now that u have him .. he will replace me . so .. you shouldn't have a problem with life then ... so just live your life as per normal .. live it well .. ~~ Don't need to worry bout me .. i will live my life well . it's either that i live it well .. or i die . if only humans .. can know when they will die .. then at least i give u a date .. and u can take time to prepare ..to recieve a call from my buddies .. that i'm gone . His last wish ... was .. to see all the ones that he love b4 he go .. and for you to live your life well . ~~ when i grow up .. i guarantee... i will think bout you . that the best fren i once had ... the times we had shared .. the pain we have gone thru .. the tears we have cried . Our hearts that have been broken . Will i be alone ? in the end ? will i ever not find a woman in my life ... ~ i have always say this .. Regrets we should avoid .. no one should ever have regrets if we can avoid them ... ~ i am forcing myself to leave .. my legs stay still ... but my mind forces them to go ... i wanna stay ! i wanna go back !! but .. fate brought me here . there's no turning back . ~ i have given u enuf chances ... it just takes perhaps one more to bring us together again .. if not .. that one chance may be useless .... ~~ Bye ... it's a long goodbye .. i always thought .. " i'm glad we are on this one way street .. just u and i . " but now .. another man has come in .. to take me away ...

posted by Ben @ 2/22/2004 02:04:00 PM